A Voice

A voice

inside my head

said 

to me

girl, 

who are you 

trying to fool?

don't you think 

it's been long enough?

don't you think 

it's time to give up?

girl, take off your scarf

I heard the voice laugh-

cruel and sharp

it pierced a hole 

right through my heart

stop pretending to be 

holy,
solely for the sake of others...

stop pretending to be

someone you're not-
blot it all out.
I heard the voice shout

girl,
stop lying to yourself!

Perhaps you could 

don a balaclava

instead

the voice said

it might suit, 

start to loot 

this world

become a criminal

become a mute

a non-identity

is hard to find

for every kind

of costume 

carries weighty 

ideas, 

it's not you're fault

that there's no 

default 

way of living

and now

this is the result 

you remain static 

not wanting 

or able 

to move backwards 

or forwards

the conundrum 

of the ascetic who gave 

up the world 

whose certainties soon

began to unfurl

and who slowly 

began to forget

how could you let

this happen?